Surprise and Delight

My first post-high school employment was with Howard's TV Repair. Howard had a pretty good understanding of human psychology. He insisted that we clean the outside of each television set repaired in his shop before it was returned to the owner.

It never took long. Less than 60 seconds to Windex the front of the picture tube, and maybe another three minutes to wipe the dust and fingerprints off the rest of the set. (It always amazes me, even today, how much dust, cigarette smoke, and other schmutz accumulates on the 'tube and dims the picture).

When we'd fire it up for the owner, the usual comment was, “Wow. That looks good!”


Why am I thinking of Howard today?

Because I just received a postcard from the shop that did extensive repairs on my truck. It was a nice “thank you,” and it arrived within 48 hours of the work being completed.

I paid $437 for repairs to the steering linkage. (Well, more correctly, $420 for the steering linkage, and $17 to replace the windshield wipers).

I picked the truck up at 5:30 pm, and drove it home into the setting sun, squinting through the dirty windshield. Now, granted, it was that dirty when I delivered the truck at 7:00 that morning. But, still, they paid enough attention to note the rubber was shot on my blades, and completely missed the filthy glass on which that rubber sat.

To the best of my knowledge, Howard never repaired any vehicle other than his own. However, I have no doubt that under his supervision no vehicle would be returned before the mats were vacuumed, the dash wiped down, and the glass cleaned.


And here I sit looking at this postcard.

The shop did good work. I'm not upset with their price. And yet, it would have been so easy for them to delight me with four minutes of extra, unexpected attention to the little things.

I don't know what you sell, or what services you offer, but isn't there some nicety you could do for your customers to surprise and delight them? I'm not talking about discount coupons or loyalty cards or even a free gift with purchase. I'm talking about just doing something nice. Something that could generate incredible word of mouth.

Something like:

The complementary hand sanitizer at the checkout of Mi Tierra Mexican Restaurant in Southaven, Mississippi.

Behive Music in Fargo loaning an amplifier for that night's gig to a guitarist who's amp was in their shop.

As one of California's major fires worked it's way up the Cajone Pass, the daily phone call to out-of-town owners of rental homes managed by Blue Star Properties of Victorville. (With evacuation on everyone's mind, Ben Lamson's crew minimized every owner's worry by providing the latest information, and showing they were on top of the situation).

The Cincinnati O'Charlie's Restaurant waitress who, slammed by the after church crowd, still noticed a lady with a walker coming around the side of the building, opened the side door, and found her a seat immediately.

The cleansing wipes provided by the Kroger Grocery in Portsmouth, Ohio so that shoppers can wipe down the handles of the shopping carts.

The taxi owned by El Torrito Restaurant in Evansville, Illinois, painted with their logo, that the restaurant parked by the street during the day and used in the evening to take home customers home who had spent too much time in the cantina.

The U.S. Postal Service repackaging my magazine when the cover tore, in order that it arrive without additional damage.

The complementary coffee served to those customers waiting to be seated at the Bob Evans Restaurant in Columbia, South Carolina.

The customer service representative of Chase Bank in Huntington, West Virginia who called the new customer with the name of a blues band looking for a bass player that his new-to-town customer had asked about the day before.

Do you have any personal examples of delightful customer service?

If you don't mind, hit the “comment” button and tell us what the business did for you, how it made you feel, and roughly how many people you told about it.

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Investing in Your Ads

I've long said that advertising is an investment, and should be treated like other investments.

When you expect high return quickly, there is high risk. When you expect slow, consistent growth the risk is minimized.

So I found this quote particularly interesting:

“Fact #1: From 1984 through 1995 the average stock mutual fund posted a yearly return of 12.3 percent, while the average bond mutual fund returned 9.7 percent a year.

“Fact #2: From 1984 through 1995 the average investor in a stock mutual fund earned 6.3 percent, while the average investor in a bond mutual fund earned 8 percent.”

Gary Belsky & Thomas Gilovich explain how funds can earn more than the people who own them in Why Smart People Make Big Money Mistakes and How to Correct Them:

“Rather than investing in a few well-researched mutual (ideally index) funds and holding on to them for a very long time through thick and thin – the classic “buy and hold” strategy – most people flit in and out of a whole passel of funds in an effort to maximize their returns.”

Of course, if they got into better performing funds this observation would be pointless. Apparently, the odds go down the more often the investor changes strategy.

So, back to my comparison to advertising. Much like investors in stock funds get bored with the performance of their funds and believe changing will improve their returns, investors in advertising get bored with the performance of their advertising and believe changing strategies will improve their responses.

In both cases, they're usually wrong.

Imagine how much better a good strategy could work were it given time to impact all of those people who haven't yet been persuaded to do business with you.

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A Banking Story - The Ten Day Hold

I've just had an unpleasant experience with my bank.

Interesting. I called it “My” Bank. Why did I do that? Merely because its the institution I've used for several years?

I remember why I chose this bank to begin with. I'd just moved to a new community to take a job with a company which required direct deposit of all payroll checks.

I chose this bank because it was directly across the street from my office.

Not because they offered free checking (they didn't), or for the vast number of their ATMs (which they didn't have in this community). I didn't even choose them because they were "big enough to handle my needs but small enough to care." The bank in question was owned by one of the biggest bank holding companies in the U.S., and since then they've been acquired by an even bigger company.

(Side question: “My” bank changed owners two years ago. Are they still mine? Probably. I haven't noticed any significant changes other than the signage.)

Nope. All of the reasons banks put in their ads about why I should choose them meant nothing to me. I chose by location, and accepted everything which came with the package: the hours of operation, the fees, the interest rates... all of it. After I went into business for myself as a marketing consultant I opened a business account with the same bank.


Flash forward with me.

A couple of weeks ago, I, an otherwise satisfied customer, closed out a brokerage account and deposited the funds into “My” bank account. I hadn't brought a deposit ticket with me, so I had to ask the teller for a blank deposit slip and to look up my checking account number.

I was told there would be a minimum ten day hold on this check, so that it could clear the issuing bank. Knowing this to be standard policy for many banks around the country, I merely nodded, took my deposit receipt, and left for my office.

On the eleventh day I called to ask about my deposit. I was told the hold on my check was for ten “business days.” Oh. Business days. OK. Because of the weekends, another four calendar days, I guess.

On the fifth day following, also known as the eleventh business day - called by most people the seventeenth day after - I checked my balance online and found the check had still not been credited to my account. I started looking for the bank's phone number. It took far more effort than it should have to locate the national 800 number for the bank holding company.

I spoke to Rita in customer service. “Rita,” I asked, “what's the point of requiring me to punch my account number into the phone, if you're just going to ask me to repeat it when you come on the line?” Rita had no answer, other than their system couldn't transfer the number with the call.

I asked that she explain why the funds from my former brokerage account had not been credited to my checking account. Rita assured me that the hold up was the fault of the issuing bank. I politely suggested that wasn't likely, but that I would follow up with the brokerage.


The brokerage house didn't leave me on hold.

Nor did their system drop my account number when transferring me to a human in account service. Ron looked up the check, and assured me that it had cleared their bank three days after it had been issued (in other words, two days after I deposited the check).

Some serious Google searching for another few minutes and I finally located a number for the local branch, which I dialed. I got the branch manager's voice mail, hit “zero,” and was transferred to the receptionist. After checking, she told me that my funds would be available the following day.

“Why are those funds not available now?” I wanted to know. I was told that until midnight, they wouldn't know how much money they'd received in the transfer from the other bank. (No, I am not making this up). “You're a bank. You don't know how much money people are sending you?” I asked, incredulously. Again, I was told my funds would be available after midnight.

So, the following morning I logged on to the bank's on-line banking service to find the deposit had been made into my business account, rather than my personal account. I assumed a trip to the branch was in order.


Picture this layout:

Walking through the door puts the tellers on the left, the office cubicles on the right, a waiting area with couches and coffee on the back wall, and the receptionist desk in the middle of the big open area.

I approached the receptionist, who was busy ignoring me and curtly answering questions on the phone. I recognized her voice (and attitude) from the day before. The receptionist explained even though the customer had personally brought a check to the bank yesterday morning, that didn't immediately put funds into her account. Her deposit wasn't counted until midnight, and the check she was attempting to cover had been presented for payment yesterday afternoon. (Again, I'm not making this up).

Finally, when she asked how she might help me, I dragged a chair from an adjacent desk and settled in. I showed her both checkbooks. I explained that the deposit had been made in the wrong account, and asked her to make it right.

As she silently whacked the keys on her terminal an older woman, using a cane to steady herself, walked to the desk and asked, “Miss, can you tell me how much longer it will be?” The receptionist stated in a cold, professional voice, “I've told them you're out here.” The older woman said “We've been waiting forty minutes. My friend gave me a ride, and she has another appointment soon.”

Without making eye contact the receptionist said “I don't know what to tell you,” and went back to ignoring the woman.

When my transfer was complete, and the new receipts printed, I left. The older woman was looking at her watch. The receptionist was avoiding eye contact with the gentleman who'd been waiting his turn to speak to her.


I'm trying to decide whether to call the branch manager.

On the one hand, if I was the manager and didn't know of poor customer service, I'd appreciate having it pointed out. On the other hand, this woman's desk is in full view (and earshot) of six teller windows and four loan officer cubicles. I suspect all of the other employees have seen this behavior regularly. If that's the case, why doesn't the manager already know?

Should I call? Do I care? Will I move my accounts?

Truthfully, I don't believe that the next bank will be any different.

What's the difference between Bank of America and Sun Bank? Between Wachovia and Chase? Between Fifth Third and Wells Fargo? Can anyone articulate even a slight difference?

I can't, and I'm paid to find and exploit those differences.

Bank advertising is so homogeneous we could probably exchange logos and no one would notice. (Except maybe for WaMu. Their ads are much more memorable. They don't offer anything their competitors don't, however. In the end they only have more clever advertising).

We can't find the differences because there aren't any. They all keep the same hours, pay the same interest rates, charge the same interest rates, offer the same free checking, and have coffee in the lobby. They all have the same automated tellers and charge the same fees for using someone else's automated teller. All are “big enough to serve me and small enough to care.”

I should hope so. Who'd do business with a bank that can't even reach the minimum criteria for entering the game. Telling me that you're just like everyone else in your industry effectively makes you invisible.

I suspect many people choose banks as I did: they pick the one on the closest corner. And if that is the case, the only way any bank will gain market share will be to build on more corners.

Of course, the capital outlay required for this strategy will severely cut into operational profit, and the shareholders will probably revolt.

If I'm right, people don't change banks because they perceive any advantage in the new bank. They only change when they're upset enough to refuse to do business with the current institution. Advertising under these circumstances can only try to attract the attention of someone who's getting ready to abandon her current bank.

That person is likely to choose the next bank based on location and convenience.


Isn't it time for concierge banking?

Isn't it time for someone to open a bank that caters to the needs, perhaps even to the whims of the customers? Wouldn't you be willing to accept a lower interest rate on your savings in order to have a bank call and say "If you can get a deposit to us before midnight tonight, we won't have to bounce this check?"

That only happens to me a couple of times a decade, but I'd be intensely loyal to a bank that cared that much about me.

Because when all of your competitors are pretty much the same, its not your advertising that drives market share. Its the way you do business.

I'll be reinvesting the funds from my brokerage account. None of my investments will be in bank stocks.

And I still haven't decided whether to call the branch manager about the receptionist. What's your opinion? Should I bother?

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Chuck McKay is a marketing consultant who focuses on professional practices and owner operated businesses. Questions about legitimate advertising strategies for small business may be directed to ChuckMcKay@ChuckMcKayOnLine.com.

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A Marketing Lession with Jack and Magic Beans

Jack was a poor boy who, since his father ran off with a search engine optimization specialist, only wanted to promote his family information business. Jack's widowed mother sent him to market with their last remaining possession - an option on cattle futures. “Cash this in, Jack,” she instructed, “then we can buy another two million gross exposures for our infoproduct.

But along the way jack met a stranger who convinced him to trade his cow futures for a new software product called “Magic Beans.”

“Its a brilliant product,” said the stranger. “Instead of paying for legitimate advertising, the Magic Beans product takes your sales letter, and cleverly replaces the verbs, then the adverbs, then the pronouns, and generates another sales letter that basically says the same thing. You embed the same keywords, link to your main site, and get fabulous search positioning.

Thrilled at the prospect of something for nothing, or, in this case, something in exchange for his last remaining asset, Jack made the deal, and proudly went home to show his mother.

Alas, his mother was less than thrilled. She stomped off into her room as Jack installed the Magic Beans program in his desktop.

And I, your faithful storyteller, was able to watch Jack at work. His output magically appeared on my laptop's screen. Would you like to see how the Magic Beans did?

Here is part of the unedited output of the program:

According to United States today article, Advertisers Forced to Think Manner Outside the Box, engineering is giving sellers a tally for their money. From radio devices to iPods to digital picture recording equipments (DVRs), time-pressed consumers have got many more than picks and control over what they melody up in or tune out. Even though advertizers increased disbursement 10% to $140 billion last twelvemonth as reported by Tennessees Media Intelligence, that onslaught may just be turning all selling messages into a clump of agitation that ranges no one.

Jerry Dyas*, President of Trade Only Design Library, Inc., have been saying for old age that in today's concern human race an enterpriser have to force the envelope with his selling message if he desires to stand up out from the competition. Dyas, a nationally recognized gross sales and selling strategian with an impressive history of drive grosses through "out-of-the-box" marketing schemes states people are hesitating to take chances.

"Most people look to see how others marketplace and make the same," said Dyas. "Most selling is deadening and acquires mediocre consequences so you have got to be different. Being different volition pique some people but your occupation is not to do others happy." Throughout Dyas' career, his empirical observation is that if selling doesn't stand up out, only poor consequences ensue.

But Dyas doesn't intend to travel out of your manner to purposely antagonise people. So, what makes he intend by" pique people"? "Just make something that others wouldn't do," Dyas says.

Take Measurable Solutions, a Florida-based physical therapy consulting house for illustration – one that made the Entrepreneur Hot 100 List in 2005 as one of the fastest-growing newest concerns in the nation. Their selling message that helped them hit the big-time was Get New Patients Out the Wazoo! 'Wazoo' may have got offended a few people, but it was one of their most successful direct mail postal cards to date.

How do you feel about this company's ability to deliver? Would you buy from them? Would anyone?

Remember the words of my dear, sweet, saintly old Grandmother Fanny McKay, who once said “If it sounds too good to be true, it's probably another case of magic beans.”

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Chuck McKay is a marketing consultant who focuses on professional practices and owner operated businesses. Questions about legitimate advertising strategies for small business may be directed to ChuckMcKay@ChuckMcKayOnLine.com.

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Advertising Can't Create Demand

I don't know which is sillier. The general public who believe that advertising can convince people to buy things they don't need, or advertisers who endlessly search for the magic message to drive more demand for the things they're selling.

Each somehow believes that ads condition people to consume.

They're both wrong.

Advertising doesn't do that. Life does.

What's the single biggest reason that a shopper will buy barbecue sauce?

Running out of barbecue sauce.

Advertising will never convince someone who hates barbecue to love it. It can, however help someone in a grocery store to notice your bottle and say “Hey... I've been hearing about this. I think I'll try it.”

Which means no matter how many gross ratings points you purchase this week, only a small percentage of barbecue lovers will also be purchasing this week. Your mission is to make 'em think of your brand the next time they go shopping.

Side note: both groups of silly people (general public and uninformed advertisers) believe advertising works, but only on other people. Never on them.

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