Communications Theory

Years ago, while I was conducting sales training classes, I noticed that the attendees eyes all glazed over at the same point in the training. There were two ways I could have reacted.

I could have said “Why do I keep getting the stupid trainees?” Or, I could have said, “I need to re-write this material.”

I chose “B.”

When I changed “This is a mutually beneficial marketing opportunity,” to “This deal is good for both of us,” I saw their heads nod in agreement.

But, please notice I simplified the vocabulary, not the concepts. That's an important point, because your prospects are smarter than you've been giving them credit for being.

How many times have you heard it said that to be successful your ads, your brochures, your instructions should be written at an eighth grade level? Have you interpreted that as “write for dumb people?”

You shouldn't.


Talk to people in the words they use.

Its been demonstrated that the average adult in the U.S. Has a vocabulary in excess of 30,000 words, but uses fewer than 1,000 in daily conversation. My own experience with small children and adults who are learning English as a second language indicates that meaningful conversation can occur with approximately 300 words.

So, which words should you choose for communication with you prospects and customers? The simple words. The short, unambiguous, commonly used and easily understandable words. The words they use everyday in other conversations.

But don't dumb down what you need to say. That makes for poor communication, too.

Earlier this week I read (again) how important it is to keep communications to arbitrary lengths. A press release must be no more than 360 words. A blog post no more than 170. No article or essay to be posted on the web should exceed 800 words. Why? Because people won't stay focused for more than three or four minutes. At least, that's the theory.

And yet, we still have bestsellers lists of novels, business books, technical instruction – how many of them run more than 300 words? No kidding? All of them (he asked, his virtual voice dripping with sarcasm)? Most have three hundred times that many. And people keep buying (and reading) them.

These people who won't stay focused for more than a few minutes are still purchasing movie tickets, watching televised sporting events, and attending lectures. They're buying and reading magazines, and learning to speak other languages (with vocabularies in excess of 300 words, no doubt).


Let me propose an alternate theory.

People have short attention spans when you're boring them.

If you have to limit your blog posts to 170 words its because at an average reading rate that's the limit of people's attention spans to badly written communications. If you can't hold the attention of a reader for more than 360 words, its probably because you have nothing to say, you're saying it badly, or you're not expressing yourself in the words that make for easy conversation.

People's attention spans aren't limited to three or four minutes when what you have to say is meaningful. People are just not willing to be bored.

So, how do you stay interesting? There's no getting around that you have to write about things your audience wishes to read about. But, assuming your content might be meainingful, when you have the choice, choose Anglo-Saxon rather than Latin words.

Choose “let,” rather than “permit.” Choose “make” instead of “manufacture.” They're easier to spell and easier to understand. They are the words people naturally use in their own conversations. As Winston Churchill said “Short words are best and the old words when short are best of all.”

Richard Lederer, in The Case for Short Words, said “Short words are bright like sparks that glow in the night, prompt like the dawn that greets the day, sharp like the blade of a knife, hot like salt tears that scald the cheek, quick like moths that flit from flame to flame, and terse like the dart and sting of a bee.”

Emotionally powerful, isn't it? And yet, these are words the average three-year-old understands.

Did you notice that every one of those words was a single syllable long? Did you feel the writer had “dumbed it down?” Or could you actually feel that sharp blade and those salty tears?


Effective Communications.

If you have something to say, say it succinctly, say it emotionally, say it in ways that maximize understanding. Say it in simple, direct words. They are the shortest distance between two minds. And use as many words as it takes to make your point.

If you have nothing to say, by all means limit yourself to 170 words.

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How To Measure Anything

For years I've toyed with the idea of writing a book on common sense market research and analysis. There's no longer any need for me to do so, since Doug Hubbard has already written it.

How to Measure Anything: Finding the Value of "Intangibles" in Business by Douglas W. Hubbard will change the way you look at what you don't know, because of what you do know.

According to Hubbard, it’s all about uncertainty reduction, which is the basis for all exact science. How much do you know now? Express it in terms that represent your uncertainty.

Hubbard calls his studies Applied Information Economics. People who hire him are eager to understand exactly how to calculate the values of an intangible - customer satisfaction, the value of public health, or the financial risk in a new IT investment, for instance.

Applied Information Economics is showing up in the most interesting places. The U.S. Marine Corps, for instance, hired Hubbard to create a way to forecast fuel requirements for battle, which is presently being used in the war in Iraq. Hubbard's methodology reduced their previous forecasting error by more than half.

I like this book for much the same reason that I enjoyed Freakonomics: the key to finding the answer you seek is in asking the right question. Chapter two - Eratosthenes, Enrico & Emily - is my favorite chapter, probably because he quotes from one of my own Wizard of Ads ^® case studies.

Who'd have thought that you can measure customer satisfaction, or the value of happiness?

If you've ever wondered how much to charge for a product, or whether your branding campaign is generating a positive ROI, you're going to enjoy How To Measure Anything.

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A Blues Band, Elvis, and an Affiliate Program

A number of years ago, I wrote a business plan for a blues band, of which I was the bass player. When I took a job in a community across the country, I re-wrote the plan, wrote some marketing materials which explained the music we played, and started working the plan and seeking bookings for my new band.

I also started interviewing musicians.

A guitarist that seemed to be a good choice told me that I was either trying to scam potential employers, or was an idiot. “You can't book a band that doesn't exist,” Jim insisted.

I asked how many gigs he'd been paid for in the last year. “Well,” he said, “I'm still having trouble finding the right musicians.”

“But Jim, you've been trying to form your own band and rehearsing with various musicians for... how long,” I asked? “Two years? No kidding? Two years with no pay at all. Do you think that you could learn some classic blues songs if I give you the lead sheets? You already know those songs? Great. Then a couple of run throughs with the rest of the band should be enough to get you comfortable. We have six paying gigs lined up. They pay seventy bucks, each. Wanna play?”


I was reminded of this incident in a conversation with an Elvis fan.

The fan explained Colonel Tom Parker had been charging 50 percent of Elvis' income for managing the star. The fan believed that the Colonel had taken advantage of Elvis. Apparently its a commonly held belief. “Where would he have been if he hadn't been lucky enough to hook up with Elvis,” the fan wanted to know?

I know exactly where he'd be.

It helps to understand who Colonel Tom was. The Colonel was born Andreas Cornelius van Kuijk in June of 1909 in Breda, Netherlands, the fifth of eleven children. After graduating from high school, he relocated to the U.S. and volunteered for the U.S. Army. Following his discharge he changed his name to Tom Parker, lived as a hobo, and joined the circus as a carny for Royal Amusement Shows.

In the early 1940s he worked as an ASPCA dog catcher, and pet cemetery proprietor in Tampa, Florida. As a dogcatcher, Parker put his circus training to use. He gathered the pups from several dogs, placed them all with one mother, and called a reporter from the Tribune to report a single dog had just given birth to 21 puppies. Apparently he did this more than once, and got press each time.

His first job as a show business manager began in 1944 when he took over the career of country singer Eddie Arnold. By the end of 1947 Arnold had been number one on the country charts for 53 weeks. When Parker and Arnold separated he began booking country star Hank Snow, taking over as Snow's manager in 1955. He began hiring a Memphis rocker named Elvis Presley as Snow's opening act.


Presley was unhappy with the direction of his career.

Presley sought Parker's advice. Parker told the young Presley he could be a star, if he'd hire the Colonel as his manager. Parker also told Presley it would cost him 50 percent of all future income. They couldn't sign a contract because Elvis was still represented by a man named Bob Neal. They shook hands, and went without a written contract until Presley died in 1977.

As Presley's “special advisor” Parker negotiated Elvis' recording contract with RCA Victor, insisting that Elvis would have final choice of all of the songs on the album. In 1956 Elvis ended his relationship with Neal, and Parker officially became Presley's personal manager. By the end of their first year together the Wall Street Journal noted that Elvis had grossed $22 million in merchandise sales alone. (Another bit of circus influence, no doubt).

It was Parker who landed Presley in all of those Hal Wallace movies in the 60s. It was Parker who came up with the idea of soundtrack albums from those films, which Elvis fans snapped up as fast as they were released.

When popular music had changed, and the public had seemingly grown tired of Presley, Parker promoted Elvis' sagging career through the first worldwide performance via satellite. That particular show was seen by one and a half BILLION people in 40 countries, returning Presley's status as a top concert draw, and keeping him at the top until his death.

So, to answer the fan's question, where would Parker have been without Elvis? He'd have been taking some other performer to the top.

The Colonel wasn't lucky to have found Elvis. Elvis was lucky to have found the Colonel.


Let's change gears for a moment.

Pretend that you've been selling your widget for $10 each. Along comes Sammy Salesweasel, who offers you $15 each for all you can supply him with.

Do you care who he's selling them to? Does it matter how much he sells them for? If he can sell them for $50 each in a new market that he's developed, doesn't he deserve the profit? Especially since you're now even more profitable?

One of my clients sells his service from his web site. He has an “affiliate program,” in which other sites sell his service and keep 65 percent of the revenue. Is this fair? Is it unfair? Are they sales he could have generated on his own?

My client believes 35 percent of sales he'd never have had to be pure profit. By letting the affiliate keep twice as much money as he keeps himself, he gets a highly motivated affiliate selling his service.


So here's the lesson.

The lesson from the affiliate program, from Elvis' relationship with the Colonel, and even from Chuck's blues band is simple: Don't begrudge the marketer.

The critical question isn't "what's my percentage? The question you should be asking is, "What's my return on investment?"

When you find someone who can make you money, count the dollars deposited into your bank account, the dollars it cost you to produce, and do the math.

Is 85 percent of “not much” better than 50 percent of “a lot?”

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Warren Buffet Digs a Well

Warren Buffet is the world's most successful investor because of two personal characteristics that come close to defining his investing philosophy. He doesn't diversify, and he refuses to “hedge his bets.” You'll note Berkshire Hathaway's holdings are in fewer than three dozen companies, spread over a very few industries.

Although I've never spoken to Mr. Buffet, I have read several analyses of his investment strategies. I'm told he doesn't worry about diversification, because he's heavily researched each investing decision. Hedging his bets by spreading the risk between additional companies would actually increase his risk, by forcing him to invest in additional companies that are less likely to succeed.


Isn't there an advertising investment parallel here?

Spreading the budget between as many opportunities as you can afford insures that the best you'll ever get is average. The likelihood is that your advertising investments won't do even that well.

I found a story to illustrate the concept in a book by Anthony Putman called Marketing Your Services. He tells of a farmer whose crops were drying out from lack of rain.

The farmer started digging a well, dug to 50 feet, gave up and covered up the hole. The next day he chose another location and dug again. By the end of the day he'd again hit the 50 foot mark, gave up, and filled in the hole.

This continued for 17 days before he admitted defeat and sold the farm.

The new buyer dug a well to 50 feet, and stopped for the day. The next day he dug to 80 feet, and stopped. On the third day, at 85 feet, he struck water, which filled the well, and provided all of the water the crops needed.

Buying a small schedule in the newspaper, on four radio stations, two television stations, and spending a few bucks on web development is rather similar to digging new wells, isn't it? If any of the media you're dabbling in could have actually delivered, you've already cut off the funding at 50 feet in order to finance a different media schedule.


You can't afford to keep digging dry wells.

You only need one good source of water, or customers, so long as it's tapped into an unlimited supply.

So, back to Warren Buffet, who consistently digs deep enough to find water each time he digs. But then, he does the required homework. Its his full-time job. He hires managers to run the companies.

You probably don't have the resources to hire managers.

Could you find someone to research and allocate your advertising investments?

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